The RESET Button

You know that big red button that says RESET on it? Don’t you wish that you could hit that button whenever you mess up? Guess what? That button does exist! It exists in your mind. Here’s how it works for me.

When I am unfairly harsh with my daughter, I can choose to feel shame that affects my whole day, or I can apologize to her, hit the RESET button, and go on with my day.

Because of my skin issues, I am careful to take good care of my body. When I have trouble keeping up with my health routine and my skin starts to bother me again, I can choose to feel helpless or I can hit the RESET button and start tightening up my routine again.

When I am not as consistent with my business activities, I can get overly discouraged or hit the RESET button and decide to increase my activity for the next week.

If I don’t meet my goals, I can choose to believe that I will never achieve them, or I can hit the RESET button and figure out what needs to change in my life so that I can meet my goals next time.

After I make any kind of mistake—big or small—I can choose to let it ruin my day, or I can hit the RESET button, give myself grace, and learn from the mistake.

Do you need to hit the RESET button? You will be more successful in life if you choose to hit the RESET button sooner, rather than later!

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What is the Secret to Vibrant Health?

Do you want to know the secret to vibrant health? The secret is—there is no secret! What works for me may not work for you. Do you want to know why?

Every Body is Different

When I was struggling with a painful psoriasis flare on my hands, I tried different things for six months. The major changes that helped me were changes to my diet, a visit to a Functional Medicine practitioner, and a cleanse. When I visited the Functional Medicine practitioner, my lab results revealed Epstein-Barr reactivation and possible MTHFR mutation. Another person with psoriasis would have different laboratory test results, which is why my protocol might not work for another person with psoriasis. Some people with skin problems might only need to make minor changes to their lives, while others might need to make more drastic changes.

Everybody Has A Different Health Background and Environment

Some people had some health disadvantages starting at an early age because they were born via Cesarean section or because they only drank formula when they were babies. Some people constantly ingest antibiotics and medications that are harmful for their gut health. Some people are exposed to occupational hazards or many poisonous chemicals in their homes. Some people are exposed to toxic people at work and at home, leading to excessive emotional and physical stress. The fixes that I have found for my particular health background and environment would not apply to you because your health history and environment is different than mine.

So, the bad news is that there is no secret sauce for vibrant health. But the good news is that vibrant health is attainable.

Be Your Own Lab Rat

Start by making some small changes. If you don’t get the results that you want, add another small change. Add more water to your diet, add some greens to your diet, get rid of endocrine disruptors in your home, eliminate some processed foods from your diet, learn a new stress management technique, or start doing yoga. Keep track of how you feel after you add something new or take something away.

Visit A Functional Medicine Practitioner

A conventional physician will spend a few minutes with you and write a couple of drug prescriptions for you (in the long run, these drugs might do more harm than good). A Functional Medicine practitioner will spend a lot of time with you, (the consultations with my practitioner lasted for 60-90 minutes) will work to find the root cause of your symptoms, and will create a special care plan for you. My decision to see a Functional Medicine practitioner was one of the best decisions that I made for my health.

Keep learning and listening to your body. Vibrant health is within your reach. Don’t give up!

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We Can’t Stop Talking

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.

James 1:19

I have tried to keep my distance from social media and the mainstream media for awhile, but unfortunately, I have been more “plugged in” these last few months. This means that I have become more aware of the endless controversy and anger that the media constantly stirs up in everyone. You could say that I fell into the media’s “hysteria trap.” So, a couple of weeks ago, when a good friend of mine posted something controversial on her social media site, I became overly emotional and initiated a digital chat with her.

Our digital chat went on for a few days. After those few days, I asked her if she wanted to talk about it over the phone or in-person. When I saw her in-person, I apologized to her because I thought that she was offended by what I had expressed to her. To my pleasant surprise, she told me that she didn’t feel like what I said was harsh, and at the end of our conversation, she was glad that we had talked about the issue.

If I could go back in time, I wouldn’t have confronted my friend about my feelings through text because texts can be easily misinterpreted. What I should have done was talk to her about it over the phone or in-person from the start. Thankfully, I think that the conversation went really well, and it made me realize that we—as a society—can’t stop talking to each other about issues that matter. Here are three reasons why.

We need to keep learning and we need to realize that we don’t have all the answers.

If we make assumptions and snap judgments without trying to understand another person’s views and experiences, then we might never realize when our beliefs are wrong or misguided. We might be unknowingly advocating for the wrong solution.

We don’t want to have regrets.

In a previous post, I wrote about five common regrets that people have on their deathbeds. According to Bronnie Ware, one of the common regrets was stated in this way—”I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.” I don’t think that it is always good to say what is on your mind, but depending on the issue or scenario, a healthy discussion can help to bring about positive change.

We don’t want to be lonely anymore.

I used to think that people can’t be lonely if they have friends and family, but this is not true. According to Psychology Today, people feel lonely if they don’t feel “in tune” with people around them or if they feel like there is a “lack of authenticity” in their relationships. Loneliness can contribute to health issues such as depression, heart disease, type 2 diabetes, psychosis, and Alzheimer’s disease.

There are so many polarizing issues to argue about and I have come to believe that these issues often lead to anger and division because of fear. Perhaps if we put our fear to the side for a little bit and allowed ourselves to be authentic and vulnerable with our loved ones, then we would not feel so lonely. If we have these conversations with discernment, love, and the truth in mind, I believe that conversations about these important issues can ultimately bring us closer together.

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Kindness Craving

When I was younger, I didn’t think that I had special talents like other people did. I was just the skinny, quiet Asian girl with big glasses and braces. So, I thought, well, if I can’t be really great at something, at the very least, I can be known as “the nice girl”. So, I tried to be nice to my peers.

As I got older, and started to embrace my unique gifts, (everyone has these) I started to care less about being the nice girl. When I was busy with school, work, and babies, I subconsciously told myself that I don’t have time to be nice anymore.

About a year ago, I realized that I was wrong. The world is craving kindness! And you know what? Kindness doesn’t have to take too much time or effort. Here are some ideas on how to show kindness.

Open the door for pregnant ladies, new moms—or anyone, really.

When I was pregnant with my first child, two gentlemen walked ahead of me and opened the double doors on each side of me. I felt like a queen walking through those doors!

When I was a new mom, it was overwhelming to go shopping with my new baby and a stroller. It meant the world to me when someone helped me open the heavy doors in front of me.

Instead of sending a boring text message, send a voice “text” message.

I don’t know about you, but I am on screens so much that I start to hate my cell phone. Instead of sending another monotonous text, send a voice text. I bet your loved ones would love to hear your voice!

Send snail mail.

I have a bad habit of only opening my mail once per week or once every other week because I like to avoid unexpected bills and useless paper. Snail mail from a friend is usually a welcome surprise!

Give someone the benefit of the doubt.

If someone takes your place in line, don’t get all bent out of shape. Maybe she had a lot on her mind and wasn’t thinking when she stepped in front of you.

Smile and be friendly to strangers.

Strike up a conversation with someone and see how someone’s day is going. If you are practicing “social distancing”, you can still do this from a distance.

Say nothing negative for a day.

This is good for the mental health of you and the people that you live with.

Be curious about someone else’s views without voicing your own opinion.

There’s a lot of division in the world—it’s really concerning and heartbreaking! When you have the time, why not sit down with Uncle Fred and ask him why he believes the opposite of you when it comes to Issue X? If you genuinely care to learn, Uncle Fred will probably be happy to share with you, you might learn something, and the whole conversation might bring you closer together. Uncle Fred might even ask you to share your views with him. I struck up a conversation like this with my aunt a few years before she died. If I had not initiated this conversation, I might not have known her or respected her as much as I do now.

For more ideas, check out Shaunti Feldhahn’s book, The Kindness Challenge. What other ideas do you have? I need more!

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The Mommy Pooch and Other Mommy Issues

When I visited my midwife six weeks after having my third baby, she told me that I had diastasis recti (abnormal abdominal separation) and referred me to a Physical Therapist.

According to Healthline, diastasis recti can lead to:

  • jeopardized trunk stability and mobility
  • back pain
  • pelvic pain
  • damage to posture
  • pelvic floor dysfunction
  • hernia, in extreme cases

I had two other kids at home and a newborn to take care of. How was I going to find time to see a Physical Therapist? I used to have really strong abs before I had kids. I could handle this on my own—that’s what I thought, anyway.

For the next few months, I went on YouTube and searched for workouts that targeted Diastasis Recti. I worked on my abs off and on for months, but the Mommy Pooch would not go away.

During this time, I also started having mild symptoms of pelvic floor dysfunction (urinary leakage) and learned that childbirth can be a cause of that.

According to Healthline, symptoms of pelvic floor dysfunction include:

  • urinary issues, such as the urge to urinate or painful urination
  • constipation or bowel straining
  • lower back pain
  • pain in the pelvic region, genitals, or rectum
  • discomfort during sexual intercourse for women
  • pressure in the pelvic region or rectum
  • muscle spasms in the pelvis

In February, I finally started seeing a Physical Therapist for diastasis recti and mild pelvic floor dysfunction. From day one, I could tell that the hands-on manipulation and customized exercises were helping to heal my abs. After two visits, I did not have anymore issues with urinary leakage. (The pelvic exam and exercises were a little awkward, but they were worth it!) After a couple of weeks, I could tell that my jelly-like abdomen was starting to revert to the solid muscle that it once had been. It is now easier to perform normal daily activities and I hope to be able to do some more intense workouts in the near future!

Have you ever been treated by a Physical Therapist?

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